


(Not) Getting Married

by BlossomingDia



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Arguing, Fights, Friendship, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Unrequited Love, Weddings, breakdowns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-09
Updated: 2020-01-11
Packaged: 2021-01-25 20:14:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21362023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlossomingDia/pseuds/BlossomingDia
Summary: When Sicheng goes to check on the groom, he encounters an unanticipated problem.
Relationships: Dong Si Cheng | WinWin & Qian Kun, Dong Si Cheng | WinWin/Qian Kun, Liu Yang Yang/Qian Kun
Comments: 1
Kudos: 52





	1. Chapter 1

Gentle music floated from the organ as Yangyang adjusted his cuffs with a small smile as he took in the crowd of guests who gushed over the decorations, carefully arranged by himself and the groomsmen to suit even his fiancée’s over observant eye. The flowers were arranged in pairs, carefully twisted into an arch that framed the altar but didn’t obscure the light flowing in through the windows. Oh no, Kun would never forgive him for that.

Glancing at his watch, he allowed his brow to furrow as he noted that the wedding should have started five minutes previously. “It’ll be fine, I’m sure Kun’s just making sure that his hairs are all perfectly in line or something… you know how he gets before big stuff like this!” Lucas laughed as he clapped his hand onto Yangyang’s shoulder. 

“I know” He chuckled nervously before turning to Sicheng who kept absently staring at the door, waiting for Kun to make his appearance “Sicheng.” The man perked up slightly at the sound of his name “Would you mind going and checking on him, to make sure he’s OK?”

Sicheng nodded, rising to his feet and hurrying quickly through the halls, half expecting to bump into his friend as he wandered his way through to the dressing room. Kun would be finishing up with his hair, probably a little panicked about being late, but feeling calm and collected in a way that only he could be –

The image of Kun that he saw when he opened the door was nothing like what he expected. His eyes were wild, blown wide with hysteria as he tugged his hair from its prison of gel and paced backwards and forwards from one end of the room to the other. Hurrying forwards, Sicheng seized his wrists, pulling them away from his hair and using them to gently guide his friend to a little sofa that they’d all been occupying barely half an hour when the room was filled with laughter and champagne at the thought of their friends getting married.

“Kun?” He asked gently as he noticed the wetness in his face and tried to judge whether it was tears or sweat “What’s wrong?”

“You gotta get them out of here Sicheng, you’ve gotta give them their gifts back and take back the cake and the suits- I cant…!” His chest heaved with exertion as the words tumbled out of his mouth.

“You can’t what?” 

“I can’t do this! I can’t get married today!” 

There was a moment of stunned silence as the pair exchanged wide eyed looks, and for a moment Sicheng felt an awful bubble of sickness in his gut as he held Kun’s hands tighter and tried to plaster on his most understanding smile. “What do you mean you can’t get married today? Are you not feeling well or something?”

His face trembled horribly for a moment before consolidating into something that was nothing like a man on the happiest day of his life “I just- it just hit me when I was looking at these champagne flutes that we’re _actually getting married_ and God- I didn’t think it through-“__

_ _

_ _“You did think it through! It took months for Yangyang to convince you to set a day, and you said you were ready to do it at last-“_ _

_ _

_ _“It just hit me Sicheng- how can I marry him and ruin someone so wonderful with everything going on with me?”_ _

_ _

_ _“You know he doesn’t care about that, he doesn’t think you’re going to ruin him.” _ _

_ _

_ _“Well what does Yangyang know really? We shouldn’t be getting married because he deserves better, he deserves someone his own age, who’s more into the things he likes and wants to go out and do things with him-“_ _

_ _

_ _“Kun!” He hissed as he grasped his friends cheeks in an attempt to calm him from his frenzy._ _

_ _

_ _“I tried calling Dr Kim and he said I could see him on Monday, but how is Monday going to help when I’m having this revelation today? How can I talk to Dr Kim when my soon-to-be husband will probably kill me by the end of our honeymoon when he realises that he’s stuck with a nutcase for the rest of his life-“_ _

_ _

_ _“Listen!” Sicheng shouted, staring the blonde straight in the eyes as he began to speak slowly and surely “You know that it’s just pre-wedding nerves. You know that Yangyang doesn’t care that you’re older than him, or that you guys like different stuff, or the fact that your brain works a little differently to other peoples… hell the man sat and wove a flower arch with no two of the same flowers next to each other because he knew you would be worried about it, and if that doesn’t tell you that he loves you regardless, I don’t know what will.”_ _

_ _

_ _His words seemed to have knocked some sense into his older friend who turned back to the mirror with a strangely serene expression, applied a little gel to the ends of his fingers to slick his rogue hairs back into place, straightened his tie and turned to Sicheng with a strange calmness which seemed out of place in comparison to his hysteria. “I’m ready.” He whispered._ _

_ _

_ _Sicheng gave a little nod and opened the door, gesturing for him to go through and follow him towards the hall with Kun trailing a few steps behind him as they passed the entrance to the hall and prepared to turn into the room. Inside, the organ swelled to signal his arrival and guests shushed each other, turning their eyes to the door to watch the entrance of the wayward groom, who took one step into the hall – and promptly wrenched himself away from Sicheng who was meant to be walking him down the aisle to take off running out of the door, flagging down a cab on the street and leaving his stunned wedding party behind him as he began to sob into his hands._ _


	2. Chapter 2

Going ahead with the wedding reception seemed sort of tasteless in Sicheng’s opinion, especially with the gossip spreading amongst the guest of the supposedly scandalous events that had lead to Kun running out of the church. Even more so when poor Yangyang was sat in the honeymoon suite that should have been shared with his husband cradling a large bottle and trying to avoid the awkward silence that blanketed the room as his groomsmen tried to avoid asking the obvious question. Two thirds of the way into the bottle, the silence was finally broken. 

“I don’t understand,” Yangyang mumbled against the rim of the bottle as droplets of the liquid spilled out onto his white shirt “I don’t understand why he would just run away like that- he said that he was ready-“ His words were broken by a sob as he swallowed down the rest of the contents and set the bottle to the side to begin another “He said he was ready, didn’t he?” 

“Yeah he did…” Kunhang soothed as he took a seat on the bed and wrapped a comforting arm around his friend’s shoulders “But you know, sometimes these things happen… we can’t know what was going through his head when he decided to leave, but we know at least that he loves you because there’s no way that he would be cruel enough to plan everything out and just leave you.”

The words of comfort seemed to do little to sooth the crying man who seemed to stop abruptly as his gaze rose to meet Sicheng’s. He stood slowly and approached, edging ever closer until he stood right in front of his groomsman with a sickly smile that set him on edge far more than the bottle that he had clasped in his hand. The silence stretched again and with it came an awful tension that set the other men on edge. 

“You know don’t you Sicheng?” 

“Excuse me?” 

“You know why he decided to run out of our wedding, don’t you?” Yangyang asked sweetly, leaning forwards so that the awful smell of alcohol filled Sicheng’s nose “would you care to tell me what happened?” Sicheng remained silent, casting his eyes away from the teary and borderline hysterical face of his friend which seemed to contort more with rage with every passing second that he went without explanation. “Tell me what happened that made him run out on me!”

“He- I-“ He began, then reeled back as hands shot out and pushed him. Once, then twice before the younger man lunged at him, tackling him to the ground and beginning to deliver blow after blow to anything he could reach. The others scrambled desperately, trying to pull him away from Sicheng who attempted to shield his face as best as he could. “Is it true? That you made a move on my fiancé and that’s why eh decided that he didn’t want to get married?” Yangyang hissed with accusing eyes.

“No! You know that I would never do that to you – you’re my friend and I know how much you love him!” 

“Well I also know that you’ve had a thing for him since you guys were in college, so forgive me for being a little sceptical about what you’re saying.”

It was as if Yangyang had kicked him in the stomach, his words bringing a wave of pain and sadness on Sicheng, who straightened up and wiped the blood from his lip “If you really want to know, it had nothing to do with me. In fact I talked him in to going through with it before he got cold feet right before he went in.” A finger jabbed at the younger man’s chest harshly “He left because he was worried about ruining everything if he married you, and instead of going to look for him and dealing with his worries like you should have done, you sent me in to help him cope with a panic attack that left him thinking that you would end up killing him after your honeymoon when you realised what he was like.” Another jab. “So don’t you dare stand here and accuse me of doing something to make Kun doubt wanting to get married, when its obvious that he probably had fears beforehand that you weren’t listening to. It’s even more obvious that you’re just looking for someone else to blame instead of yourself, but its not going to be me. So I recommend that you get yourself in order and grow up a little bit before you sort things out with Kun.” 

The room devolved into stunned silence as Sicheng turned and left the room, caring less about Yangyang than he had done before as he headed downstairs into the party and glanced around briefly, finding the individuals he was looking for sat in the corner, trying to blend in with the walls and much as possible. He approached them with a friendly smile, making sure to straighten his shirt and hair before beginning to speak to them “Mr Qian, Mrs Qian, I know that I’m probably the last person you want to see-“

“Actually, I think that honour goes to Yangyang” Kun’s father muttered “Or his parents.” 

“I need to speak to Kun. I swear that I won’t tell anyone else where he is if you’ll just let me see him.”

The pair exchanged a look and a quiet word before nodding and gesturing for him to follow them as they left the hall as inconspicuously as possible, letting out a sigh of relief as they settled into their car starting the engine with a word from Kun’s mother who smiled at him hopefully in the mirror “Thank you dear, its probably for the best that we left before things got any worse than they are already… I just hope that you might be able to talk some sense into him.” 


	3. Chapter 3

Kun, as it turned out had resorted to hiding in his bedroom at his parents house, and was sat rearranging boxes of junk from under the bed as Sicheng entered, taking note of the music playing unitedly in the background as he slumped back onto the bed and set about ordering a pizza as casually as possible. They lapsed into comfortable silence for a short while, as if daring each other to make the first comment until eventually Kun spoke up “I’m not in the mood for you to lecture me if that’s what you’re here for. I already know that I messed things up, and I already feel like shit, so if you’ve come to tell me all of that then I don’t wanna hear it.” 

“I know, I thought you’d be mature enough to realise that what you did was kind of shitty but I still have to make sure that you’re alright because you’re my friend after all, and that’s more important than any wedding or any thing that you might have done.” The deafening quiet stretched between them again though it was significantly less uncomfortable as Kun crawled onto the bed next to him and stared at the ceiling while listening intently to the music for a little while “This is a good playlist, though I’ve not heard you play this before.” He commented offhandedly. 

“You wouldn’t have. The only people that knew about these were me, Yangyang and Hendery who helped to make them.” He fished under the bed for a moment then produced a box of tapes of varying colour and design “He used to make me mixed tapes ‘because I’m old fashioned’ and give them to me on special occasions.” Pausing, he thumbed over the worn labels with a sad look “He stopped doing things like this before we got married and I started to wonder if he didn’t do it anymore because the spark was gone between us and stuff like that wasn’t important to him anymore.” 

With a groan, he pushed the box away to bury his face in his hands. Sicheng observed him for a moment, feeing the tugs of some long buried emotion in his chest as he looked at Kun, red faced and pouting as if they were teenagers again. “I can tell that you’re holding onto a lot, so why don’t you try to talk to me about it all? It might be a little easier to explain now that you’ve calmed down a little.” 

“I just… I don’t know! The little things we did before we got engaged slowly began to disappear and all of a sudden he was spending more and more time out of the house. I didn’t wanna ask him where he was going because I don’t wanna drag him down when he’s so young and all, and I guess – I guess it just stuck with me… and then the day of the wedding rolled around and I felt like I couldn’t breathe Sicheng at the thought that I was holding him back from doing whatever he wanted that wasn’t being tied down to me.” 

“You know that he’s never seen you as anything less than perfect right? He practically worships the ground that you walk on.” 

“I know,” came the simple reply, and something in his tone had Sicheng looking up to see the silent tears streaming down Kun’s face “I know that he’d do anything for me, and I’d do the same for him and now I’ve just messed everything up. Though perhaps its for the best-“ 

“Stop that right now.” Sicheng hissed as he seized his friend’s hand and tugged him across the room to the desk where a stack of old tapes sat waiting for him “If you wanna talk to him and find out if there’s any hope for your relationship then you need to send a sign to him and let him make the move if he’s ready to do so, or accept it if he’s not. If he comes back after listening to what you have to say, then you’ll know for certain that things can change for you both, for the better.” 

The two hours following their discussion were an agonising mess but eventually the tape sat ready for delivery at which point it was neatly packaged up in its little case and was dropped through the mail slot of the flat that they had shared before the whole wedding fiasco. With every passing month without response, Sicheng saw Kun deflate more and more coming to accept the reality that some things couldn’t be fixed and despite the rising flames of hope in Sicheng’s chest for his own affections, it still hurt to see his friend become more and more downtrodden with every moment that passed without answer. 

The answer came on a morning when the last of the winters snow was melting away, and as the glares of the sun came in through the window both Kun and Sicheng found themselves roused by an obnoxiously loud sound drifting in from outside. They approached the window gazing down into the street below to see Yangyang and his groomsmen perched on top of a car playing the all too familiar tape as they watched the house for any sign of movement, and as Kun watched his fiancé with wide glossy eyes, Sicheng watched him. 

The look that was shared between the two of them was adoring, and as he watched Kun bound the stairs to greet a new future, different from any he’d imagined before, he felt a dull ache of pain. It was quickly trampled down as he plastered a smile on his face and went down to join them knowing that he could be content with being involved in their lives, no matter how little he was involved, as long as they could be happy together. 

**Author's Note:**

> I know I know I know, I've been AWOL for a while but I promise I'm trying my best! I'll try to update over the weekend, but for now, let me know what you think!


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